- by Nikki


A moment when change is required.

Everyone has to come to a point when we stop and assess the health of our connections, choices and paths.

Today is evaluation day for many of us. Look at what is being produced in every area of you life. Is it “good fruit?” Do you like what it’s yielding? Is it elevating your character or causing you to act out of character? Are there areas we could stand to do better in?

Ask God to show you the areas that need improvement and then ask Him how to go about improving. Remember, life is too brief to revel in mistakes but too precious not to live past them.

Assess. Decide. Move Forward.

Nikki Washington,
The Chaste Life

The Age of Innocence

 - by Nikki

Awhile back I was at dinner with 3 of my sisters, among them 2 of them share the same testimony of virginity as I. It was interesting. For as long as we’ve all know one another, the topic of purity is not something we find ourselves talking about a lot. In fact, outside of just general accountability, we really don’t discuss it at all.

I mention this because for the first time in us knowing each other, I realized how different our views on purity really were. Bad? No…just different.

As I listen to one of my younger friends talk about her purity, I remembered what it was like to have her completely idealistic views. To have that pure sparkle my eyes, before the disappointments of life caused it to dim. To assume that if you just did the right thing you would ALWAYS get what you desired. To believe that God had a special place in His heart for me and JUST because of this one sacrifice….hindsight is so amazing…I use to be so inwardly legalistic…wow, thank God for deliverance. The funny thing was I would extend grace to everyone else, yet I held myself to the letter of the law. Until one day it clicked…

God is the One that is keeping me.

Running into the revelation of that simple truth would be the turning point in ministry for me and the way that I ministered about the power in purity.

I would realize that purity wasn’t about dressing matronly. I would learn how to embrace my outer, rather than deflecting from it so as to not appear too “fleshy” (whatever that means, lol). I would come to understand that it IS possible to be perceived as appealing or desirable and NOT be living in sexual sin. I would find out that the absence of sex didn’t necessarily mean the presence of purity….and Most of all, I would begin to do the work so that my thought life aligned with my physical testimony.

And at the end of that process you know what I found? A heart that beat like His…now isn’t that something? :)

I share my story today for two reason. First, it serves as my reminder of how God continues to faithfully keep me -in spite of how undone I was and at times can still be. Secondly, it’s a reminder that God has the power to do it for you too! That is, if you’re open to letting Him in…I hope your encouraged today. I hope you feel loved. But most of all I hope you find rest in the knowledge that God is able to keep what we are willing to commit to Him.


Nikki Washington
The Chaste Life

Do the “Almost” Right Thing?

 - by Nikki

IMG_3259Sometimes doing the right thing just sucks…

And yeah, I know. Not the most eloquent sentence, but it’s honest…

To know me is to know I purpose to live a life that pleases God in all that I do, in every area, at most times…most…

I say most because the reality is; if we’re all transparent, we don’t always do everything JUST as we’re supposed to, JUST the way the Word instructs at ALL times. In fact, for many, it’s a press to stay disciplined and I, just like you, have my moments…

You know what I appreciate? Leaders who speak of their deliverance, SINCE they received salvation. How many times do we really hear people speak of mistakes made SINCE receiving salvation? Dare I say few. You see, we live in a “church culture” where some (NOT all) feel as if they have to reference past sin as an afar off former thing in order to be a leader. Don’t dare be a leader and say you’ve made mistakes –recently. Don’t dare say you still struggle with pride and be in a position of power. Be sure not to mention the last time you cussed was when you stubbed your toe yesterday. And certainly don’t mention you’ve had moments of being on the edge of towing the line in your walk…

Yeah, that would be too much, right? Or would it…

I share the above scenarios because it’s the reality of so many people who LOVE God. I share the above scenarios because they challenge legalistic dogma. I share the above because, to have flaws, makes you and I no less saved. Really, if perfection were the perquisite to salvation none of us would be saved. Any good that we are and any good we do can ONLY be attributed to God’s grace working in and through us…

Recently God has been dealing with me regarding a couple of areas of my life. He’s been showing me in what ways I’d grown lacks in my disciplines. The funny thing is, I saw it coming… Isn’t that just like God though? Giving us little nudges before He has the “Big” chastening conversation with us? Ugh! I mean really, how GOD of Him, right? :-)

Nevertheless, this was my case. I realized there were some things I just wasn’t doing as well as I use to do. I wasn’t allowing God to work in me at full capacity. I wasn’t exercising like I use to. I was becoming lacks in my thought life. I even found myself slipping as it pertained to the consistency of sharing content by way of this medium. For that, I apologize. See, as to where I could run down my hectic itinerary, or go on about how I just don’t have time anymore and blah blah blah, I won’t. The reality is –we make time for what we want to make time for…and so as for me, I decided to acknowledge the disconnect, be accountable and start over. In hindsight, the subtle removal of disciplines was such a slippery slope…

See, it’s easy to think were on the right track because we’ve mastered a few areas, but I just believe God wants us to exercise discipline in all areas. Here’s the thing I’ve discovered about discipline, there is no place of arrival there. In fact, it’s an ever evolving thing. Again everyone has something. Some are disciplined with finances, but not so much when it comes to maintaining physical health. Some are excellent when it comes to being healthy, but they lack control of their tongue. Some of us are excellent at allowing God to maintain our celibacy, but lack the ability to guard our hearts with all diligence. I could go on but you get the jest. Again I say, everyone has something…and as un-fun as being disciplined can at times seem, I’m inclined to believe, in the long run it’s worth it. Paul said it best, “No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, for those who have been trained by it, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace. (Hebrews 12:11 -NIV).

I can’t speak for anyone else, but I made a decision I want everything that God said is mine and the peace that comes with it…so change is upon me…

I’d like to share with you the same challenge God gave me. Assess the areas you want to see change in. Are you disciplined in those areas? Do those areas align with the Word? Do you have accountability? Have you disconnected from anything that would be a hindrance to your process? In all of your growing, are you employing spiritual insight with practical application? In all that you do is your primary focus to please God? Just a little food for thought…

It’s spring…what a fitting time for spring cleaning…

Keep going.

Change looks good on you…  😉

Nikki Washington,

The Chaste Life


Be sure to subscribe! :-)

Get Candid Radio!!!

 - by Nikki

Did you know I host a weekly radio show? Yep! Over the course of the last 5 plus years I’ve been blessed to be apart of some awesome radio show broadcast, including hosting my own. With my latest show, “Get Candid” we address everything in a real, and relatable way, all the while laying a biblical foundation! Check us out every Thursday at the link below and share your thoughts!!

Listen to internet radio with IndustryBuzzZ Media on BlogTalkRadio

We’re On Kindle!!!

 - by Nikki




So, we published the book, “The Pleasure Principle…” on #Nov28th however, we decided to wait until today to release the #Kindle version of the book! That’s right, it’s HERE! Yay!! :-)

Thank you guys for supporting the cause. The intent behind the book is NOT that of a biography, a “self-help” book or even a guide… No, this work is simply to inspire other to have the conversation and to encourage those who have chosen the path of purity. Simply put: this book gives an uncomplicated, surface look at the “taboo” subject of purity.

I’m truly grateful for what God continues to do! It’s been amazing! Lastly, for those interested in checking out an e-copy of the book, feel free to checkout the link below. And as a bonus, we’re offering it at an exceptionally reduced price.  Just our little way of saying “Thank You” for your support!








Much love!


Nikki Washington,

The Chaste Life


The Pleasure Principle: Book Release

 - by Nikki

So…I’ve written a book…  :)

“The Pleasure Principle: The Naked Truth about holding Out -when you want to get It in. is THAT book. It’s that candid conversation you have with your best friend. It’s those heartfelt words written across your journal. That whispered prayer that ascends from your heart to God’s ear.

For years, I’ve shared my testimony of virginity, but never have I shared in this way before. This book is, hands down the most naked book I have ever penned (pun intended). :)

“The Pleasure Principle…” is more than a purity read, it’s a discussion. It’s a candid conversation for married and unmarried alike about God’s true intent for sex.  At the end of the day, my prayer is something shared blesses you, reaches you and causes you to see sex in it’s proper context, as a gift from God, rather than a forbidden desire.

It’s real. It’s raw. It’s relatable.

Are you ready?

“The Pleasure Principle…” It’s coming….11/28/14

Nikki Washington
The Chaste Life

To pre-order your copy, email us

Title: The Pleasure Principle

Release Date: November 28th

Price: $10.99



Q&A: Do You Ever Desire to have sex?

 - by Nikki

Greetings all!


Below you will find part 2 of our Q&A we began this past Monday titled, “I Know My Worth!”  I decided to post them in the evening as oppose to morning because I figured if the Jimmy Fallon could have “late night” tv, then I could have a “late night” vlog! LOL! All joking aside, I hope you enjoy. These blogs are not meant to be an in depth conversation, but rather to simply begin the conversation, and also to encourage anyone who may need it.


As always if you have questions, please feel free to email them us. No topic is too taboo, as we’re here to sharpen one another!

P.S. Be sure to SUBSCRIBE for updates! :-)


Nikki Washington, The Chaste Life

Introducing: “I Know My Worth!”

 - by Nikki

Hey all!

Today we’re beginning a 4-part series titled, “I Know MY Worth!” The concept behind these vlogs is to inspire, encourage and uplift all of those who find themselves journeying on the path of celibacy and abstinence. Below is an INTRO vlog just to reintroduce myself to any that may be new to the site.  :)

Lastly, if you should have any questions, please feel free to submit them to! I’m looking forward to growing with each of you as we talk about worth, sex and purity.


Don’t forget to SUBSCRIBE for updates!!! :-)